Feeling blue?

Why am I feeling so blue?  Is it the weather?  Life?  Meds?  Food?  Probably all of the above.

 

I just feel so BLAH and have been for a couple of weeks now.  I've felt very out-of-sorts since my dental surgery last Wednesday.  Bone grafts, extractions, gluing, etc., but that's not all of what makes me feel so yucky. 

 

Going through a bit of a relationship shift right now, but we're working on that one.  It's hard work and I feel at my age, I'm not sure I want to do it sometimes.  Just so tired of stuff.  Just want to hide away in a cabin with a fireplace, soft warm bed, knitting, tv and endless vanilla lattes. 

 

I'm tired of working.  I have to get my head on straight.  I just keep thinking I'm tired of working this same job every day, but then I only have 7 years left here until retirement.  Seven years.  That's not very long, but when I think of it EVERY day, it is horrible.  Have to get my head into one day at a time.  One foot in front of the other as my friend, Bill, says.  Just get through each day.  It would help if the building industry was busier in this town.  That would make my job busier and more interesting.  Have to make up projects to keep myself busy.  That gets tiresome.  Have to do what I have to do because I do not want to be without a job in this horrible economy.  No way.

 

On a lighter note, I'm almost finished with my Mom's Christmas present, my niece's baby blankets and am now working on a gift for a co-worker for Christmas.  I am in the mood for finishing things.  I went through a period of starting so many things that I felt I couldn't possibly finish any of them.  Keep myself overwhelmed so I stay in this pity pit.  Ridiculous, so I am now finishing up projects hoping they make me feel better.

 

On a weight loss note, I'm not doing so good.  Not dumping on sugar is the worst thing.  I can eat whatever I want and I don't dump.  Seems I only dump when I eat way too much, so I only eat enough to keep myself the side of non-dumping.  I've gained about 8 lbs and am working that off.  I've cut back on the evening snacks and that's helping.  I do have to exercise more if I want to be under 200 by Christmas.  That's my gift to myself.  I know I'll feel better just knowing the number is there. 

 

I've been really bad about not taking my vitamins.  Now that I've said that, that's probably why I feel so run down and shitty.  Duh!  See what I miss by not blogging?  I don't carry my thoughts quite right.  So now I've broken out the pill container from my purse and got my vitamins set for the week.  My goal will be to take all my vitamins for each and every day this week.  Have to get it out of my head that it's not a "chore", since I tend to want to overwhelm myself that way.  Why?  I have no idea.

 

Enough self-analysis for today.  I'm tired of it.